My Accidental Love is You, Chapter 46: This May Be Love

My Accidental Love is You 《รักนี้บังเอิญคือคุณ 》Rak Ni Bang-oen Khuo Khun
My Accidental Love is You, Chapter 46: This May Be Love

Pete


Now that Ae has been on vacation for a few days, I've come to realize one word - loneliness.

"Ugh~" I sighed softly, the teacher on the podium sputtered endlessly, but I got one in my left ear and one out of my right. I didn't hear a word of it in my head and I was wondering if I was going to go home tonight, because I wouldn't have anyone to eat dinner with or go to the apartment to sleep with, no one calls me up in the middle of the night to watch a football game with them.

Longing for each other is like as deep as the sea and the waves that rise up are huge, missing someone makes one lonely.

When did I become such a scared lonely person?

I asked myself, although there had been times before when I'd taken a week off from Ae on vacation, at that time I knew that as soon as I could see him when I came to school and I was still in the throes of moving into my apartment, so I was very excited about that brief period of time. The separation wasn't so strong. No, it was because I was happy just to see Ae at that time. It's bubbling and since we've been together since we've had sex, we've been lonely as hell after just a few days apart.

Now that Ae is still out with his friends, I don't think he misses me...

"Ughhhh!"

"Pete, are you okay? Are you sick somewhere?" As soon as class was over, I started sighing on my desk with the side of my face pressed up against it. Shaking my head in her direction,

"It's okay, I'm okay."

"So is there something on your mind? I heard you sighing for the whole class." Still sounding worried, I shook my head again, my face still pressed lifelessly to the desk.

"No, I'm really fine." I give him a smile and he suddenly offers me his hand.

"But you're so pale, are you sick and feverish?"

"Obnoxious!”

“....”

I also saw the girl reaching out to take the temperature of my forehead and as soon as I tried to dodge, I heard a disgusting voice in my ear... I and the girl next to me were stunned by the meaningful words.

"People have already said it's fine, but you still keep bothering me, don't you have any idea how much of a nuisance you are?"

"Uh~Tin"

"Pete, I'm... I'm going first." As I turned over to remind Tin, the girl quickly said goodbye to me and strode off with the other girls. I could still hear them talking when I left the classroom.

"What a loser! Who does he think he is? Calling me obnoxious!"

"Well, we all heard that, he is doggish-looking and with a temper worse than a septic tank!”

The group of girls had already left the classroom and I looked back at Tin, who was looking down at his phone, as if he was completely oblivious to their words. I could only remind him gently, "Tin, you shouldn't talk like that, there'll be all kinds of rumors. Four up, people will vilify you, even though you're not who they say you are."

"And what kind of person am I?" He turned his head and asks me and I freeze and then said,

"I don't know what kind of person you are, I just know I love the way you looked when you ask me for Can's number and if you're really like everyone else... How could Can possibly accept you as you are now?" I smiled at him, not telling him what Can had told me, knowing full well the relationship between the two of them is definitely beyond the bounds of friendship, or at least Tin's feelings for Can are beyond the bounds of friendship.

Finally Tin puts the phone in his bag and speaks indifferently: "You're so kind, you knew from the start so why did you let that woman approach you..."

"But I've never given anyone else any hope and you know I don't mean to do any of that with women at all." I told him straight out, because at this point, he knew almost everything about me and I thought he'd say something to Ae... He didn't say anything to make me angry, but he asked me in an unusually friendly tone: "I don't think we'll see each other after the holidays. Right?"

"Well, if you mean Can, I haven't seen him either." I couldn't help but smile and tease him, as if joking with him made me feel a little better myself and followed him out of the classroom, taking it upon himself to decide who the unseen person was that he was referring to.

"Is he still coming to school on vacation?" It sounded like he was asking about Ae, but I knew as if he was talking about Can and I kept answering his questions as if I don't know anything - of course, I'm also talking about Can and not Ae.

"I heard there's football practice, but it's not for the first two weeks, so they're probably out on vacation. He said on the line that he got a new number. Did you know that?" When I said that, Tin actually smiled. I thought I was hallucinating, but before he looked away, I could actually see him grinning, it's one of those uncontrollable grins.

"You've changed so much lately!”

"What?" He stopped smiling right away.

"You are much nicer than you used to be, jeez. You don't have to say anything. I guess you've changed because of Can." Tin was stunned as if he was trying to decide whether to say it or not. In the past, he would have called me nosy and ignorant. He walked in front and I followed behind, all the way to the college-parking lot connection point.

I felt that I won't get a response from Tin, but I did.

"You're right to think that way..."

His words instantly made me want to smile and I said I had to share this gossip with Ae. Line text beeped, so I looked down.

[We're in Phanburi, going to the beach to play football.]

Would you think I'm lying if I said I was bubbling over with happiness just reading that simple sentence? But at this point, I was so happy that I wanted to smile and the corners of my mouth were turning up like crazy and I couldn't even cancel it out. Because Ae gave me his itinerary. We barely talked last night, because he had to pack and there was a big game to watch and I thought he'd be happy with that. I'm more interested in the game and I don't want to be a little pushy and pester him to talk to me.

"Just tell him you're staying with me now." As soon as I texted Ae back that I was done with school, Tin's voice rang out beside me and I looked away from my phone to his body, then shook my head.




"You're not going to piss off my Ae anymore, but let me remind you, Can and Ae are really close." I don't know if it's because I was thinking too much, but I think Tin turned very pale when he heard what I said and to hide it and then he turned his head and looked away and that's when the car drove us to the parking lot and I felt this look on his face was familiar like I've seen it before.

"Are they particularly close?" I bet I've seen that look on his face somewhere else.

"Who's with who?" I decided to goad him into giving his name.

"Can and... that guy." For some reason, Tin just wouldn't say Ae's name properly and his tone was even colder than before, so I had to answer.

"Well, Can said that Ae helped him when he first started college and they met at the beginning of the school year and they were in the same soccer team, so it's a close relationship."

"Heh." Tin uttered one monosyllable, then watched him walk to his Porsche and I was still in a state of wondering where on earth I've seen that déjà vu expression before.

"Tin, are you all right?"

"No, I'm leaving now." After saying that, I got into my car, still standing there thinking about that déjà vu look and my phone rang at that exact moment, suddenly it hit home.

"Hello~Ae~"

[Class is over already, right? Are you going to sleep at home or at the apartment today?]

"Going home, it's not too late, I think it's better to go home."

[Well, it's better if you go home and sleep, then call me when you get home.] I didn't get to see his face, but from the tone of his voice I could tell he was worried about my safety, so of course I had to promise him. I was ready to end the conversation because I didn't want to interrupt him playing football with his friends, but before I hung up the phone, I was still in a state of shock. Throwing bad thoughts away I said said:

"Ae... I was with Tin just now~"

[...]

The silence on the other end of the line, the silence means he's upset and then the tone is stern.

[Why are you with him? Did he do anything to you? Don't hang out with him, Pete!]

In response to his irritated and overbearing tone, instead of feeling aggrieved, I smiled happily into a 100-pound grin. LOL.

"No, I'm separated from him now, I'll be home in a minute."

[That's good, you go home, don't go with him, have you gotten in the car now? Are you still at the college?]

Ae kept asking questions on the other end of the phone and I finally remembered how Tin acted when he heard that Can and Ae were close. Who has that irritated look when a certain name comes out, isn't it Ae's when he hears me talking about Tin? It's as if he's been robbed of the one he loves. There's a striking resemblance between these two extreme men!

Yes, that's right. They're the jealous kings of Southeast Asia.

Ae

"Come on, Pond, come update me, I'm dying to know about Ae, it's been a while, I can't believe he is seeing someone."

It's our first day in Phanburi and Mai, our high school leader, has arranged a banquet in the backyard of the residence. The backyard is facing the ocean and suddenly it's a place of depravity and after a few drinks, the guy's looking for something to talk about. The best way to serve drinks is to gossip among friends.

B.itch, I don't have a problem with gossiping about other people's business, but what the hell is this about me!

"I know what you want to hear. I know everything. From romance outside the dorm to entanglement in bed, this young master knows everything." I know everything and I will tell you everything I can tell you."

BANG~~

I raised my leg on the cane chair and kicked Pond mercilessly, almost knocking him to the ground, however, he actually ran to Sun's side to sit down and made a face at me.

"Nah nah nah, Ae, why are you so shy, you don't want to share with your friends? You're so bossy!"

"I'd like to know, but I don't think Ae is the kind of person who would fall in love during college. I thought he would. We talked about it and thought maybe we will find lovers when after we quit football, but I never thought it would turn out to be so sooner from what we expected..." Dior's added a second stab, I want to spit in his face, even though I agree with him.

I've never been interested in anyone before and I've never chased anyone before, so I don't think a relationship is necessary at all, all I've ever wanted in life was around football, but when I met Pete, my first thoughts were turned upside down. I've been wrong about people like Pete all my life.

"Yeah right, I'm going to have to update you all on this so we're all in the know. Okay, Ae, you. Let me tell you, or everyone will say you don't want your friends to know about your life after high school." It seems to me that Pond's reason was stupid because even in high school I didn't have to tell them about my feelings.

"What are you guys talking about?" It's not enough that the original gossips were Mai, Pond, Dior and Sun, but now there's a new member... Dear, our other little half-breed friend, these gossips are really giving me a headache and I've got one frown on my face.

"Talk about Pete, man."

"Oh, oh, oh, I was wondering the same thing, hey, hey, Mai. You haven't met Pete, have you? He's so handsome. When he walked up to us, I thought he was a star, he was so beautiful, so fair. Beautiful, smiling like a young girl at the beginning of her life, we were all dumbfounded! Sun, don't you have a picture of Pete? You took a picture together before." At that point, I turned to look at Sun, remembering that he had taken a picture with Pete at that time and now the words were said and the phone was handed over.

What do you mean? I'm sure as hell going to get his phone and find a picture of them together and delete it, which I had no right to do at the time, but now I do I have.

"Baa, Dear, are you a goldfish with a 7-second memory? Did you forget it was that photo that got me in trouble with Rio? Rio wanted to meet the guy in the photo, so I deleted it. I'm smart enough to be smart." scolded Dear yelled out in protest, I do not care, as long as the photo has been deleted from Sun's phone.

"YOu keep calling me stupid all the time. Call your date stupid if you can!"“

Sometimes I feel sorry for Dear, because even though I'm not as smart as him, my sixth sense is much better and he's such an idiot, will these scourges kill me?

"I don't want to discourage you, Dear," I was thinking to myself and the scourge was on.

Mai, that brat is playing his leading role again and he's the first one to get hurt. When bullying Dear we will be so united, next is Dior then damage:

"The fact that you asked that question speaks volumes about your unmatched stupidity..."

"What am I stupid about?" Dear never learns his lesson. He still trusts everyone even though he knows they're entertaining him. Look at Sun. The way he was winking at Dear, I wanted to kick him in the face.

"Calling someone stupid when you don't want to break up with them is stupid, of course it's stupid. Porch loves a dumbass like you unconditionally." See, eventually Dear became a target again and I had to sit quietly and drink, as long as they didn't come after me, silence is my best weapon, yelling at them makes me a target.

"But I think Ae's gossip is more interesting yay!”

"Bitch, why are you dragging me into this again~" I muttered and everyone's eyes went to me in unison and with a cheap smile.

"Stay out of my business!" I immediately yelled at him, but the more I forbade him, the more he made it worse.




"What about you isn't worth gossiping about? I'd also like to know what a short, poor man like you is getting into and boy, I'd like to know what you think of this... How serious are the feelings involved" I also knew that Mai was a bitch, but if I fought him, I'd end up being a dead man on his t.ongue, so I tugged at the corners of my mouth, Proudly:

"The crush of my affection is ten times more handsome than you!”

“....”

The air was suddenly silent and they probably didn't expect me to praise Pete so much, until Pond burst out smiling. "Oh, oh, oh, listen, I don't mean to brag, but I've heard Ae brag about his boyfriend more times than I can count, my ears are ringing. He's a silent dwarf, but he's not a man of his appearance. Ah, he still blushes when I talk about his boyfriend."

"Are you thinking of changing your roommate next semester?" I interjected threateningly before he could say more, only to see Pond fake-squeeze out a few tears.

"Yeah, I'm not your Mr. Pete. If you want to throw me out of the dorm so you can be with your boyfriend, just say so, don’t make excuses, please!”

"Pond is really pitiful, Ae has a boyfriend and then throws away her friend, she's really homosexual and inhumane!” Sun also added to the jealousy by hypocritically pulling Pond's head against his shoulder, Dior. He used the tablecloth as a handkerchief to wipe Pond's tears, turned his head to look at me and pretended to say:

"I didn't even know you were like this before, wrong about you!”

"That's enough of you playboys!” I couldn't help but curse, causing them to smile again, wanting to kick them one by one into the sea and feed them to the sharks, Just then, my line beeps.

... Ae, what are you doing?.

I immediately glanced at everyone and saw them all sticking their necks out at me like a giraffe and I had to stand up and say coldly.

"I'm going to go talk on the phone first..."

"Yo yo yo yo, who are you talking to?" They asked in unison, I turned around and said.

"It's my business who I talk to. You'll die if you don't gossip!"“

"Ouch, Sun, my heart hurts so much~ I think I'm going to rupture my spleen and die~" Mai is such a jerk. True to his name, he faked heartache and a ruptured spleen in front of me and Sun rolled over on the floor.

"Me too, me too, I'm feeling itchy all over. I think I have psoriasis." At one point, they're all going through all sorts of weird ways to die because they don't know who I'm talking to on the phone and I'm drunk and lazy. Regardless of their insanity, I walked three steps into the house - the ocean view room was sponsored by Dear's boyfriend.

"Hey hey hey, guys, I'm actually wondering how some little idiot would feel if even Ae could talk about love?" I fled the trolling area, because they wouldn't cease fire, but I wasn't the target anymore.

"Ae's not here, Porch, you come tell Dear the little fool, hee hee hee hee." See, they... I've found a new victim, but I don't care about that. Go to the other side of the house, call someone. That person made me realize for the first time what it's like to be in love.

Shortly after the call was made, a soft, low, uncomfortable voice sounded on the other end.

[Hello Ae] I started giggling just hearing him say "Hello Ae".

"What are you doing? Have you eaten yet?"

[Having eaten and showered, I thought I'd do some homework before going to bed.]

"Am I interrupting you, then?"

[No, no, no no no, we can talk, we can talk, Ae]

Hearing his rushed and panicked voice, I could already imagine his face, at first I just wanted to call and listen to him. But as soon as I heard his voice I changed my mind, I went up to the second floor and sat on the balcony and I heard my best friends downstairs. The sound of mingling and talking and the thought that I'd have a long conversation with my boyfriend.

[Ae, how are you doing? Where have you been having fun?]

Actually, I was tempted to ask him why he was with Tin today, but I'm sure I'd be upset if I did, So I gave up asking him and answered his question instead.

"Just all the way over here, my friends have no idea how to act polite, as I told you before." Dear's boyfriend sponsored the trip and the guys have been shouted to be driven everywhere we wanted to go. Going on, Mai, that guy, who doesn't know what's going on with that pipe head of his, it's like it's all the way down, he kept yelling every five minutes." I said... shaking my head at the group of losers and saying I was tired and unloved, Just hearing happy laughter from the other side of the phone made me want to go on.

"Mai this guy is really good, I wonder what he said to Dear's boyfriend at the gas station today." What? Porch will tell us that we can buy whatever we want and he will pay the bill. Then Mai carries an entire case of beer and the strangest one is Dior, you know him, he's tall and wears... The one with the glasses, he's got face wash, shaving cream and tampons."

[Huh? Tampons?]

"Well, I shook my head at that and he says his family motto is to pick what is needed back home when it's free and he's bringing tampons back to his mother."

[Hahahahahaha~ so funny oh, hahahaha~ didn't think Dior was like that, hahahahahahahahahahaha] me Before I could finish, Pete was laughing so hard on the other end, that the corners of my mouth turned up at the sound of him laughing so hard, Would love to see his face right now.

Actually, I'm not a big fan of talking on the phone, so I hang up when I'm done talking on the phone and I've seen my friends talk on the phone with their partners before. You can talk on the phone for an hour, they were bored, I would never have fallen into that state, just with... Pete went crazy in the face after they got together, so it turns out that phone calls aren't as bad as I thought!

I don't know what I was talking to him about, until I heard the losers yelling that I had fallen in the ocean and been eaten by sharks, Then he reluctantly said, "I have to hang up now."

"Well, good night, Ae and then I was just, uh..." Pete mumbled for a while and I waited quietly for him to finish and then... Hearing his shy tone of voice, I can already imagine how shy he was on the other end of the phone.

[I've missed you!]

I couldn't help but smile out loud at the disconnected phone and he hung up immediately, without waiting for my response. Gently: "I've missed you too, Pete."




Pete was my first love, it's the first time I missed someone so much... I want to go back to Bangkok soon!

Pete

"Should I call Ae? Or should I wait for him to call me?"

I was lying on my bed staring at my cell phone lying next to my pillow, hesitating whether to call my boyfriend who was on a trip to Phanburi, Since it's their last night out, I figured they'd be having one last night of partying, so no. Dare to bother him.

"Or is he asleep already?" I mutter under my breath, unlocking my phone to see that the screen says it's eleven o'clock and that Ae hasn't moved since the afternoon, Because I called him in the afternoon and now I don't dare to call him again, for fear that his group of friends will smile at him for being a strict husband.

Pfft~

"Oh, I'm so lonely. I have to go to my dad's during summer vacation. I'll be so lonely then, won't I?" In the end, I buried my head in the pillow and mumbled and sighed, I couldn't live without Ae. I feel like I'm going crazy just because I haven't heard his voice for a few hours and then I think about the annual holiday. I have to visit my father in Germany all the time and I'm sure I'll be lonely to death this summer.

Don't want to go!

I thought glumly, every year I said I didn't want to go because I didn't want to leave my mom alone in Thailand and my dad was over in Germany He's already got a family of his own and a brother who's ten years my junior, even if I don't resent my stepmother. Robbed me of my father's love, but every year I don't want to stay long when I go to their place.

Ringer~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

While thinking about it, my phone rang, so I picked it up and looked at it and before I saw the caller ID... All the things that were dwelling on the heart were instantly left behind.

"Hello, Ae"

[Are you asleep?]

"Not yet, not yet, I'm waiting for you... I'm waiting for you... uh... I'm waiting for you to call me." At first, I wanted to stop, but on second thought, why couldn't I just tell him I missed him? Ae was silent there for a long time, I had to call him:

"Ae~ do you hear me?"

[I hear you, just because I hear you, you're driving me crazy!]

I frowned, wondering what I've said wrong, but before I can ask, I hear Ae on the other end of the line with a kind of a tone of voice that seemed to be strongly suppressing a certain emotion:

[Now both my ears are full of it...]

"Huh?" I exclaimed nervously...

What moaning? Where did Ae go? With who?

I can't help but think the worst, I don't need to look in the mirror to know how ugly I look right now, just listen to the tone on the other end of the phone m.oaning.

[Dear is in the room with his boyfriend. Probably Dear, that brat doesn't know that the walls are thinner than Lin Daiyu's life, Don't he know that walls have ears? His sticky m.oans are poisoning my ears and since Porch sang him love songs, it's a wonder he's not smitten.]

"Whew!"

[Why are you sighing?]

"No!” I was finally relieved to hear Ae's explanation and just now I actually thought: who did Ae have an affair with and how dare he bring it in? Tell me. At that thought, I couldn't help but smile and Ae's tone was a bit fierce:

[You don't think I've had anything with anyone, do you?]

"No... Not at all!” I denied it, not daring to admit I was mistaken, only to hear Ae sigh too and by his tone, I guess he... I'm sure I'm scratching my hair manically at the moment.

"What can I do with anyone, I've missed you like crazy... of course I missed you, good thing you didn't come along."

Why did you say that!

Suddenly I felt a little aggrieved, but just a little, because Ae went on to say forcefully and overbearingly:

"Because if you were here and I won't help myself from hugging you and I wouldn’t want anyone to hear you m.oan...” I'm at a loss for words, Ae continued.

[Your voice is so much nicer than Dear's and I love the sound of you calling my name when I hold you.]

"Voice... What's so great about a man's voice?"

[In my case, your voice is just beautiful!]

I just want to tell Ae: didn't you ever think I'd be shy when you said that? Not to mention the fact that we've already been intimate. I was so ashamed every time he hugged me and I said his name and who would have thought he'd say he liked my screaming of his name.

"Ah... What song did Dear's boyfriend sing for him?" I quickly changed the subject so I wouldn't be embarrassed and Ae was kind enough to pick up the conversation.

[I don't know the song English version of the song. I've heard the Thai version before, a very old song, the title is already I can't remember, but this song made Dear cry. Mai's hosting a cocktail party and Dear's friend Chin is playing guitar and Pond beats along.]

The topic has been successfully distracted and I'm finally not so shy, but I'm suddenly curious...

"So do you sing along?"

[Hi~ I can't sing, sometimes I don't even know the name of a song when I listen to it.] Even though I know Ae can't sing, I still say it in a petulant tone:

"You sing me a song~~"

[I told you I can't sing.]

As soon as he said that, I thought I shouldn't pester him to sing, if not.

[Hmm, but if there was ever a song I could sing to you, I think it would be this one.]

"What song?" I suddenly became very agitated and Ae said there was a song just for me, but after my question went out, Ae instead fell into a long silence...

"Ae~~"

[I can't remember all the lyrics, so I'd rather not sing, lest your headphones get scared of my voice.] said Ae, but my need to know was so strong that I had to do my whining again:

"Come on Ae, I want to hear it, just sing it for me, okay?"

[I... All right, all right, all right... Listen, I'm only going to sing it once...]

"Uh-huh..." I held my breath and listened intently, there was the sound of waves on the phone, maybe he was outside the house, a little... After the silence, Ae's song came on,

[It may be love~]

"...!!!”

When I heard Ae sing the first line of the song in his deep, slightly magnetic voice, all of a sudden, my eyes widened, my heart was beating so fast that my chest was aching and I was breathing so fast, listening to Ae singing to me.

[... Makes the word life sound more meaningful; it might be love, makes waiting easier...]

Ae didn't sing very well, not in tune at all, but my heart was beating out of my chest, because I'd never... Didn't think Ae would sing this song with me – It might be love.

[Well that's enough of that or the tune is all over the Pacific.]

Ae has never told me he loves me, never has, but he's singing about it now, isn't he? Whether he knows it or not, he's confessing to me - I am his love. Isn't that right?

So, with a trembling voice, I said to Ae: "Ae... I love you!”

He was silent for a moment, then said softly:

[I know Pete, because I feel the same way you do.]




You see? Ae can't say the word "love", but for me, it was enough to hear Ae say something meaning it. We talked for a while and then we hung up and I held the phone tightly, tears in my eyes and a smile on my l.ips.

If you have to ask why I'm crying? Because of the origins of this song.

This may be the love that makes the word life sound more meaningful.

I immediately looked down at my phone when this song came on again, not Ae's voice, but mine specifically for Ae Cell Phone Ringtone - The ringtone I've set for Phi Trump since he stole my phone and I got a new one.

I was so confused about what ringtone to set and it took me a long time to find this song, because from that moment on I know - Ae is my love.




"Ae~" I picked up the phone and when I heard Ae's voice on the other end, the corners of my mouth turned up.

[I forgot to tell you... I miss you!]

Ae hanged up again and I hold the phone tightly in my hand and say softly, "Ae, you know what? You're my love."

Hopefully this will reach Ae's heart...



~~ My Accidental Love is You ~~

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