Fish upon the Sky Chapter 6

    Fish upon the Sky Chapter 6

   Follow the Fifth Year Student.

   Last night's bachelor party was no fun at all, it was nothing like a Fifth-Year student pretending to be a freshman. At first, I thought it would be boring to sit down with freshmen. But who would have thought, ever since I met that little guy from med school like Meen, that my boring life would be brightened up?

   “Huh.” I turned abruptly to the source of the sound and gave a gentle poke at the same time, without feeling any touch of skin at all.

   “What's wrong with your vocal cords? What's wrong?”

   He was on his mind and there he was. The little guy's always well-dressed, clean and well-groomed. And today he's got his name tag on, just like before.

   Because of what...?

   Because I had no choice but to give it back to him. As for myself, dang it, I immediately found my five-year-old nametag to dust off again and became the first-year engineering student, Phii Duean and the boys were convinced.

   Believing there's no class, that's stupid.

   “Fifth year students studying this subject please raise your hand, I would like your information.”

   Ah ~~~~ bah!!!

   What's the point of calling a roll call out at this hour, teacher? Don't expect me to stand up, no matter how important, face is the most important thing. Sit quietly and turn your attention to the first-year student who is standing with his head up.

   “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

   “I... Let me sit here.”

   “Did you house roof fall down?” When he turned his head to scold him, he held his mouth and looked like he was going to cry.

   Hey, hey! I'm not bullying kids.

   “Don't... Don't cry... Don't you cry.” So, I'm the culprit now.

   “No, I'm not going to cry.”

   “Don't hold your mouth if you're not crying yet, sit down!” Then Meen pulled his backpack off and sat down quietly next to me. The backpack is not that great but why do you have to hang a water bottle, like a prep scout, I'm going crazy. 

   “Let me ask you the truth, are you a fucking freshman?” I'm very confused, so I'd like to ask clearly.

   “Yeah, you think I'm a Fifth Year Student?”

   “No, I thought you were in Cubs. Why did you bring a water glass to class?”

   “Why is it rude to even talk to me.” This guy, he's not asking the right questions.

   “I'm asking you a question!”

   “When you speak more politely to me first, I'll answer you.” You're dreaming and how does this guy know my name.

   But when I looked down at the name tag around my neck, I knew in a second. Well... I'm the proverbial freshman brother of Duean and I'm going to keep on pretending.

   “Who the hell told you to call me by my name.”

   “You're talking rudely, I'm not answering your question.”

   “That's your business.”

   “My name is Meen.”

   “Hmmm, asshole.”

   “My name is Meen.”

   “Hmmm”

   “My name is Meen.”

   “Yes... It's... OK.” It's just a freshman and he's trying to get close to me.

   “See, you can talk politely.” A happy look at the slightest bit of niceness and at his beyond human naivety, I can only hold my mouth helplessly and shake my head.

   “Damn you...”

   “You are talking rudely again...”

   “Well, okay. I'm gonna take a break, I'll talk to you later.” The man next to me held his tongue. “Have you ever been dated anyone?”

   Meen rolled his eyes, glances up and down, almost has a squint in his eyes, what's on his mind?

   “Dated? Hmmm...”

   “...”

   “No, I haven't, why do you ask?”

   “Why the hell not?” Not surprised at all.

   “Why are you asking me about my date?” It's not enough to stare at me with wide eyes, reach over and grab my arm again and shake it, oh gee, my bones are falling apart.

   “Why the hell do you want to know?”

   “That's not what you asked for.”

   “Just a casual question...”

   “Duean.” So, annoying.

   “That's better, have you damn well seen this picture?” And then he picks up a magazine. If it was a normal person, they would have seen a cute female model in the photo, or they would have wanted to go out with her, so I wanted to know, how Meen really felt.

   “See... A woman.”

   “Well, if this guy came after you, what the hell would you do?”

   “Just praise her.” He paused for a moment before continuing. “She has a nice dress.”

   “Hmmm, oh yeah too, nice dress.”

   Holy shit

   I swear, I haven't seen anyone as dumb as this kid since I was born. Should I feel lucky to have repeated another year of school to meet a new age legend on Earth.

   “What about you, how do you feel after seeing this painting?”

   “Don't feel like I like it but for you, I'd like to...”

   “What's on your mind?”

   “Want to kick some serious ass, then steal the buttons on her dress!” Nice dress.

   Naked sarcasm, how annoying!

   “Hey huh, you have an evil heart.”

   “Shut the fuck up.”

   “Class, as some of you may know, the subject of Life Skills requires a project every year. I'd really like you all to get into groups and get your lists to your teachers by today. As far as activities go, you can arrange whatever you like, just one condition, it has to be good for the group.”

   Mr. Somrasri announced in front of the classroom. That's the guy who got me an F Grade in the last semester.

   Huh! I don't know what group I'm supposed to be in. I just went on a dog food drive with the engineering guys last semester. I think the reason I got an F is because I stole someone’s dog food to eat.

   “Are you with me on this group?” A clear voice asked.

   “Who are the people in your group?”

   “Her class requires a group of ten people, some of our students. I see you're lonely, I'm afraid you don't have a group. If you don't mind anything, we'll be in a group.” She's kind-hearted, like a fairy.

   “Hmmm, add the old man's name to the mix for good measure.”

   “What's your name? I'd like to get your school number.”

   Wow. ~~~~~ school numbers start with the Buddhist calendar, Meen the little guy is a freshman, that number starts with 57 and I... I don't want to go back to my ancestral year, I'm ashamed to let him know I'm a freshman.

   “I'll write it myself and give it to the teacher later, you can have the others write down their names first.”

   “Why you're such a nice guy, thanks.”

   I'm not nice at all. I'm known for being selfish but I wouldn't be so kind if I didn't have to worry about people knowing I'm the Fifth Year Student. Do you get it now? You silly boy.

   After the chaotic session, Meen wouldn't go all the way with his friends either, choosing instead to follow my ass, no less than the little ants following their mother ant.

   “Why are you following me?” I inquired annoyed but when this angelic faced human looked over, it felt like, I'm going to make you look inside yourself with this cold segment.

   “I don't know, I wanted to thank you.” What a trick.

   “In what name, it's not like I'm helping your family put up monk cloths.”

   “No, that's not it. You bought me a crushed ice.” And then he grabbed my hand and shook it, like a kangaroo mother.

   “Well, consider it an exchange for me taking your sign away.”

   “It's okay, I'm going to be the one buying you dinner today.”

   “No need, I can afford to pay for it myself.”

   “OK, we're friends, of course friends invite friends.” Look at me, look at the little collagen on my face first. If you knew the truth about me being a Fifth Year Student, you wouldn't say that, you little prick.

   “Each pays for his own...”

   “Duean, I really want to treat you, let me treat you.”

   “Uh-huh, Suit yourself.”

   I'm impressed, what a guy, so stubborn.

   “Let's just go get a seat, then take a water bottle and refill it at the one we always eat at.” The man in question muttered as he walked alone, stopping at an empty table.

   “It's good to learn to buy other food, every time I see you, you only buy that one.” Tired of having to start teaching all over again, like sending a kid to kindergarten, from trying to buy drinks at a novelty store to helping him find a great restaurant.

   He didn't want to wait when he saw him slowing down, he crossed over right before he was about to stop at the Leng's chowder shop he always goes to.

   Dang!

   “Duean, I'm sorry.”

   “I'll just stand there...” This guy headbutts me on the back, asking me if it hurts? Probably should have asked him more, look at his bones, “This place has good food and it's pretty clean.”

   “Uh... I want to eat light soup.”

   “Then go ahead and order it.”

   “What do you want to eat?”

   “Spicy Fried Frogs with Mushrooms.”

   “Oooh eek~~~ so cool, you can eat live things that people don't normally eat?” Ohhhh, you freaking big douche bag, is that a compliment or a scolding?

   After letting the kid from hell stand and memorize the menu, I took him to get some water. After wandering back and forth, I got my order and returned to my seat.

   Problems are everywhere, because at this point, I'm sitting back and enjoying the arduous work of this Meen who has offered to help me unscrew the cap of my bottle.

   “Bring it here, I'll get it myself.” What about the rest of his life?

   “I'm sorry...”

   “Standing there in a pestle like before...”

   “Where are you going to make me stand?”

   “Sarcasm eh, I'm being sarcastic, get it?”

   “So, why are you being sarcastic?”

   “What the hell.”

   “You're not talking properly again. I thought you said you were going to talk politely?”

   “Hmmm, fuck dinner, any more talk, I'll smash your mouth.”

   “And that means heavy handedness for sure, with a rotten mouth and a wound to treat, very messy oh.”

   “Asshole...”

   “What are you referring to?”

   “...?”

   “Just now you were talking about animals...” I'm going! I don't want to live on the same Earth as this alien anymore.

   “Hey eh! Duean, why are you here, you here for a dumped girlfriend.”

   Three words to describe it, Play~Ball~Up!

   Pretending to be a freshman before it's too late, Kor, the asshole, shows up at my desk with someone in a flash. The first thing that popped into my head was... Is this how it's gonna go down?

   “Ow, come with the kids somewhere and the sign... Wow, pretend freshman yo!!!”

   The sound of a dead yok... I hate you.

   Fearing that the plan would be revealed, he winked at him to keep it a secret. We've known each other for so many years before becoming seniors but whenever he does something cursed, he always follows him.

   “Nuts, Yok. come here with your friends from med school, people call Meen.” After that, I immediately beeped and pointed at the hell child.

   “Oh, no., Meen. Hi., My name is Yok. I'm a freshman.”

   “Hi, my name is Jeans, also a freshman.”

   “Me too, my name is James. and this one's Kor, is a freshman, ow. Three or four!”

   “...”

   “It was nice to meet you.” I know freshman... In another life.

   overplayed their hand, they're to blame for overplaying their hand.

   Meen sat with his mouth wide open, confused for a few minutes. My group of friends and I sat on the sidelines, wondering if the plan was going to go down as we feared? Until finally the silence was broken by the man we were staring at.

   “Are you all friends of Duean's?”

   “Yes...”

   “I'm so sorry, misunderstood at first, thought you were seniors who had graduated.”

   “Ow, you kid!” Kor's about to lift his foot and give him a smack and it's only my turn to hold them down for this heavy work.

   It's a good thing we rescued Meen first, otherwise there would have been many more kicks waiting for him today, oops~

   It's time to end the task of following the Fifth Year Student time!

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