I’ll Still Love You Even if You’re a Man 2, Chapter 149: What are you grieving about?

I’ll Still Love You Even if You’re a Man 2 《你是男的我也爱》Ni Shi Nan De Wo Ye Ai
I’ll Still Love You Even if You’re a Man 2, Chapter 149: What are you grieving about?

Mai Ding suddenly grabbed An-Ziyan's arm: “Go somewhere else, let's go somewhere else.” An-Ziyan didn't answer or change direction but despite his reluctance, he was driven to the cabin, where happy memories were easily overshadowed by sad ones. An-Ziyan got out of the car and went around to the other side and pulled the door open and dragged Mai Ding out but Mai Ding resisted in vain and was thrown into the house.

Tonight, though there are few stars, the moon is bright, and the moonlight softly embraces the cottage, but what was most beautiful in the moonlight was not the sight but the face of An-Ziyan, whose cold look matched the moonlight so well after only four days' absence. He had dragged himself here in spite of his own feelings and he could do nothing to him but he could do what he pleased, and Mai Ding went to the door will place its hand on the handle.

“Wanna leave me again?” 

Mai Ding's hand froze.

“Mai Ding, how many times have you left my presence?” An-Ziyan stood behind Mai Ding and Mai Ding squeezed his hands and it took all his courage to make An-Ziyan hurt as much as he did, not to look at his indifferent face, to make him hurt, to make him hurt: “You're so forgetful, you only remember what I've done but not what you said.”

“Don't talk to me in that tone of voice.”

“Why not? We broke up, didn't we? I can talk to you in any tone I want. Who are you to me?” 

His voice trembled, and he was thrown to the ground before he could turn back, his knees and elbows were bruised and he stared back at An-Ziyan in anger. He could see clearly now that there was something wrong with An-Ziyan and he went towards him. He's going to hit him?! Mai Ding closed his eyes tightly, the wind from his fist whistled in his ears and landed on the wall behind him. Then he felt the hand on his chin and he slowly opened his eyes and closed them again after making eye contact with him. 

"Look at me.” When he saw that Mai Ding's eyes were still closed, he knocked Mai Ding's back against the wall: “I told you to look at me, didn't I?” Mai Ding's eyes opened.

“Surely, it's better to keep you here.”

“You want to lock me in here?”

“It's not that I want to, it's that I will. Mai Ding, why...” he clenched Mai Ding's jaw, “Why do you have to leave me over and over and over...” 

He didn't finish the rest of his sentence, just looked at Mai Ding for a moment, let go of him, stood up and walked over to the pond on the other side of the hut. The boards creaked above the calm water and An-Ziyan sat down, bent his left leg, put his hand on his knee. His words, his actions were incomprehensible to Mai Ding, why he always treated himself so inexplicably, so cruelly and then turning his back on him, Mai Ding stared at the door, now go out, will he stay? Will he be angry? Will he stop being silent? Mai Ding moved with painful difficulty.

A car key was tossed at his feet and without looking back, An-Ziyan looked out over the water and said, “You can leave, if you want to leave that badly... but, Mai Ding, if you leave this time, I won't look for you again. Didn't you ask me to put myself in your shoes? You want to leave, I'll let you go.”

Brought himself here to lock himself up, now he's saying he's going to let himself go and he's contradicting himself... Does he see that?
Mai Ding walked over to An-Ziyan, he was standing by the door, he was about to step on the plank of the terrace, he was about to confront An-Ziyan, his heart stopped for a beat. And the moonlight fell on his face without reserve, so that Mai Ding could see clearly why his face was so sad, so sad. The fish saw it and cried, the moon saw it and cried and this was not the expression that should have been on his face. He sat quietly, sadness filled his pupils, the corners of his mouth and his skin, enveloping him. Mai Ding saw it, crying. He knelt down weakly, he wanted to call An-Ziyan's name but could make no sound, he could only stare at An-Ziyan, unable to take another step towards him.

An-Ziyan, what are you grieving about, I'm the one who should be grieving.

Mai Ding's eyelids were heavy and he thought he was dreaming, nothing fancy, just a dream about An-Ziyan holding him.

Waking up on the cold floor, Mai Ding couldn't tell which was the dream and after only two seconds, he was back to reality. The pain in his body and chest reminded him that he had only been asleep for three hours and that it was still dark. Children want to remember things but they don't and adults want to forget things but they don't. He reached out his hand to touch him but his hand hesitated in the air and suddenly his outstretched hand was caught and he opened his eyes and they stared at each other and the night lost both their eyes color and brightness.

“Why did you and Grandpa leave me?” His expression was childlike and his question hurt Mai Ding, who wanted to ask why An-Ziyan had mentioned his grandfather and after a few seconds, his face turned white as paper. He remembered that he had told An-Ziyan in the cabin, crying and shouting, with conviction: “Grandpa is gone and I love you desperately, desperately, I can't replace him, I'm just an ordinary Mai Ding, Mai Ding will never leave An-Ziyan, you still have me.” 

He lied to An-Ziyan again, just like he lied to An-Ziyan that a miracle would happen but it didn't happen, he left An-Ziyan again and again. Does time make people forget promises so easily?


~ I’ll Still Love You Even if You’re a Man 2 (Sequel) ~

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